My very first food column, reproduced below, ran in the New Haven Advocate 40 years ago, on February 27, 1980.
This column is about food and some of the elements involved in eating it — primarily in restaurants but also at home. I’ll be writing about quality, taste, pleasure, misery, money, how to do-it-yourself, and anything else related to the necessity that is eating and the luxury it occasionally provides.
It is my belief that, while there is no accounting for taste, there is definitely accounting for quality, and a restaurant reviewer must consider the two separately. There are certain rather obvious conditions that make food completely unacceptable: rotten food, food served with accompanying undesirable materials, undercooked pork and poultry. These foods are unhealthy and should be returned to the kitchen on your way out the door.
Other errors may be less blatant but are intolerable nonetheless: surely you’ve tasted the fabulous spinach a la sand? Or bouillabaisse avec broken shells (adding dentist bills to your dinner bills)? Last week’s salad, wilted to half its original bulk? Bread or pastry stale or frozen, defrosted and dry? I know you have. (In fact, I overheard this comment just last week in one of New Haven’s most touted restaurants: “This pastry is good but it’s stale.” The speaker was wrong. Stale food is not good. Good food is fresh.)
There is a large gray area between outright bad food and that which does not conform to the reviewer’s taste. This is food which does meet the most minimal standards of palatability but which is incorrectly prepared according to more or less universally accepted norms. Some may like pasta simmered for three hours and served on demand as a white mush, or lukewarm soup, or fried chicken, potatoes, or stir-fried food swimming in grease, or frozen vegetables cooked to a pulp, or lumpy gravy (getting hungry?), but those folks are in a vast minority and should be expected to order their fries with a side of oil. Most people agree that a rack of lamb is best served very rare and we are entitled to expect it that way.
Now we come to taste. Very tricky, taste, because it is almost purely subjective. Can snails be cooked with too much garlic? Can curry be too hot? Turkey too juicy? What is a perfectly cooked string bean? I know what I like and what I don’t. So do you. I detest a salad of hearts of iceberg with a syrupy, sugary, orange “French? dressing glopped on it. I don’t like margarine. Or bread without a crust. Generally when I express my tastes I’ll also indicate whether the food is well or poorly prepared.
Ambiance is a popular word among restaurant reviewers. Here I can promise consistency. There is nothing wrong with a nice-looking restaurant, but if the food is second rate I won’t eat there again. If the place is so pleasant it’s irresistible, I’ll go back for a drink. Most places that stress ambiance serve great drinks. Big deal.
For example, you can eat at either Leon’s or the Chart House for the same amount of money. Leon’s is ugly (no way around it) and the Chart House is a lovely place to sit and chat. Leon’s presents the most varied menu of well-prepared food in New Haven, and the Chart House serves rather dull steaks, chops, and an occasional fish dish. Go to Leon’s for dinner; if you need a dose of ambiance, hit the Chart House for coffee. For most of us, eating out is a splurge — get the best food you can for your bucks.
A word about money: we all feel a certain sense of well-being at the end of a thoroughly enjoyed meal. But being ripped off makes us miserable. You can buy a great sub for 79 cents or spend $50 becoming frustrated and annoyed. We look for different things when we go out to eat, but we all want our money’s worth. When we spend a lot of money we like to see the creativity of the menu in the food on the plate. When Tender Slices of Milk Fed Veal Gently Sauteed with Mushrooms, Wine, and Fresh Herbs arrives as a tough slab of meat covered with a brown sauce that could have originated in the diner next door, we’re being taken.
Many slick restaurants count on maintaining reputations as gourmet establishments by printing impressive menus. They then assume we’ll enjoy ourselves while having a pleasant social evening of eating and drinking regardless of the food. And, as long as the food’s not too bad, they’re generally right. But when we eat at a restaurant to get food we can’t make at home for one reason or another, we’re entitled to it.
Which brings me to doing it yourself. Eating out is fun and easy. All you need is money, and maybe a babysitter. Cooking is easy, too, and it’s no secret you can make most dishes at home. When I know of a better or much different method of preparing a dish than the one used in the restaurant being reviewed, I’ll include it. Many bad meals in restaurants have sent me scurrying to the kitchen for days of cooking in an attempt to get my cravings satisfied.
I’ll be writing about other food-related topics as well: wines, kitchen appliances, gastronomic events and crazes, and whatever tidbits come my way. I’d also like to determine where to find the best burger in New Haven. Suggestions are welcome.
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